Back to ....

So it is back to school time.  I struggle with myself at the store these days, and the worst is yet to come!

I am long since past attending school.  I suppose I could theoretically go back for a master's degree, but I'm not likely to bother.  And while I may at some point be involved or asked to help with the grandkids, I really don't have anyone to buy school supplies for.  BUT - I love this time of year....

For some, renewal comes at New Year's - a fresh new calendar, fresh start to the year, etc.  For others, it is spring - rebirth, the awakening of plant life, starting gardens, cleaning and airing homes...   For me, back to school time is the time of renewal and fresh starts.  Nothing like walking into the classroom for the first time - you can sit in (just about) any seat you want.  New books, new teachers, new friends, new supplies.  The promise of things to come, of things to learn, to do, to create all contained in a brand-new notebook!!  That one is my absolute favourite, and the most dangerous!  I probably have a lifetime supply of notebooks. And loose leaf paper, and copy paper.  Yet, every year, I'm drawn to the selection at the store.  Packages of pens and pencils, crayons and coloured pencils, paints and glue and scissors, rulers and geometry sets - but most of all the notebooks and binders.

All these fresh new toys, with their potential, their promise - and in a couple of weeks, they'll even come on sale!!!!

*sigh*.  I need to remind myself, that I really don't need any more notebooks.  I don't need more pens and pencils.  I have enough erasers.  And so on....

But I still have the old urges, to get a fresh start on lots of things.  Time to restart the long winter projects, the knitting, the quilting, the crocheting, cuddled under an afghan while watching TV because it is just way too cold to go outside... Comfort foods, like home made soups and stews.  Home baking, home made bread.  Warm wool socks.  Oh, and about the TV - this is when the new seasons of past favourite shows start, and new series appear.

Don't get me wrong, I hate winter - snow and grey clouds and cold.  I love the blue skies summer heat.  At least, the physical part of me is like that.  But the mental, the emotional part - I love the "nesting" part of it all.  And the learning and creating - in summer, sure, I can learn and create, as well as in the spring.  But when winter hits, there really is nothing else to do but to buckle down and stay inside, and occupy the mind and the soul.

Ok, this probably isn't one of my better organized posts, but I still like this time of year for the fresh start!! :)

Made my decision on the paintings

So.  I have a "sketchbook" with 30 pages.  The book is spiral bound.  The front of it says that each page is 12 X 9 inches.  I measured - the spiral binding eats into the 12 inch length of the paper.  So, I'm not going to get 12 perfectly matching 3 X 3 inch squares from each page.

What I decided to do instead, is to take a page, cut it as close to the binding as possible, then cut it in quarters.  Simply fold it in half, then in half again, and cut on the fold lines. This will give me four rectangles to paint on.  Because I'm going to do the painting a day thing for 30 days, I will use 14 pieces of paper to make 28 small rectangles.  For the remaining two, I'm going to use one more sheet, and cut it just in half once - so that there will be two days that I can be inspired to paint something a little larger.

And I'll only have used half the booklet.  Then, if I find that I'm enjoying the painting, I can always make more later. :)

I've also remembered some things.  First off, that I did do some painting in the intervening years - When I was attending University for my degree, I took an art class, that had us doing several techniques.  Among them was painting - and I recall that I learned a lot about self esteem regarding my abilities from that class.  Funny how I recall one major lesson when I'm offering help to others, but forgot where/how I learned it...

See, a lot of people worry about minor errors or perceived flaws in their knitting or crochet.  I remind them that when they are working on the project, they are generally holding it up close to their face/eyes, and really seeing each individual stitch.   And that if they put the item on the back of their couch, and step away from it and look at it as others will, they find that the flaw disappears.  Sort of like not being able to see the forest for all the trees.

Yet I forgot the part where I learned about that during the art class.  We were working on some paintings.  Of course, up close and personal with them.  At the end of class, we attached them to the wall, and all stepped back to observe and share with the class.... and my pictures were down right good!!  Maybe not art gallery material, but a lot better than I would have believed, looking at them on the work table while painting, and in some cases, the ones I thought I'd done terrible at were among the best of the lot!

So.  I do still have some talent.  And I should be able to derive some pleasure from this little project.  And I obviously still need to do some healing anyway, if that was closer to the front of my mind than the art class...

Not updating, but jumping in with all new info.

I should get around to updating what has been happening since my daily posts stopped.  But I'll need to re-read my last few posts, so I know what I *have* talked about, and what I haven't.  And today is not the day for that.

So instead, I'm going to talk about a plan I have for September.  One that I hope will be easy enough to execute, despite some challenges....

It all started some time ago, when I started checking a webpage every day, called One Pretty Thing .  They show a variety of links to blogs with various craft projects.  They have, for example, posts called "Daily Do It Yourself".  They also have "Kid's Craft Round Up".  Or sometimes it might be a "Crafty Food Round UP".  Or Knitting, or holiday related.  Or whatever.... there is even an archive you can check, to see what they've posted in the past.  I've found some cool stuff.  And some "out there" stuff, too.

One of the posts was about a crocheted goldfish.  But not just any gold fish.  A "plarn" goldfish.  Or beta fish.  Anyway, I loved it.  I want to make one.  As soon as I figure out the right way to work with plastic yarn, or "plarn" or recycled plastic bags.  I tried it once, years ago, and had a great deal of difficulty.  Not sure whether it was the plastic hook, or if I'd saved the bags too long and they degraded, or what, but I wasn't very successful.  I was going to use plastic bread bags to make a door mat... I found the stitches were very tight, and I couldn't slide the hook through them well - it kept sticking.

But the cute little fish is making me want to try again.

And I started reading the blog.

More recently, Trish (the blogger behind the plarn fish) wanted to get back to her painting.  So, she decided to commit to doing a small 4 X 4 picture every day, for 30 days.  She kept the supplies handy on her kitchen counter, so that it would be easy for her to do.  At the end, she mentioned that she did it with dollar store supplies.

Now, many years ago, like, back when I was around 10 years old, I wanted to grow up to be an artist.  A painter.  I bought or asked for Christmas gifts various paint sets.  I took some lessons in painting.  I wasn't bad, if I do say so myself.  But, there were reasons that I ended up abandoning the idea.  Painting became difficult, due to some issues that were happening at the time.  Well, that is now a very long time ago, and I've done a lot of healing since then.  And Trish has inspired me to maybe pick up a paint brush again.

Especially if it can be done with inexpensive supplies from the dollar store!!

I guess I realized, that to continue the healing process, I need to see if I can still paint, if it can bring me the happiness it once did.  Not that I need yet another hobby; knitting, crocheting, quilting, spinning, cross stitching and the hose of other things I do are probably more than enough.  And if I were to get back into painting big-time, it could get costly for supplies, not to mention, space to store it all!!!  So, honestly, I don't want to get back into it and fulfill that dream of becoming "an artist".  However, I think I want to try painting again anyway.  And like I said, Trish has inspired me.  And I think it will be good for me to finish healing.  I hope it helps!

But the challenge.... I'm not quite ready to explain it properly to my husband.  First off, there is the hobbies I already have, and am finding it hard to organize properly in the space I have.  So trying to explain to him that what I want to do is going to take up very little space.  Second, I know he was supportive of my interest in art when we met, but at that time, the hurt was too fresh, and I didn't pursue it then.  I don't know if he'd still be as encouraging, especially if he thought it might grow (it won't, really, I just want to know if I can do it).  Third - he's planning to take his holidays from work for two or three weeks in September.  It was going to be hard enough to paint on weekends with him around, and trying to explain why I was doing it.  Now he's going to be underfoot for most of the month.

But, I'm going to give it a shot anyway.  I'm going to start on September 1, and try to paint a small square every day.  And I'm going to fight the negative thoughts (if you couldn't blog every day because you ran out of ideas, how will you paint something every day?) and try to do one small picture a day.  I found a sketchbook with 30 pages at the dollar store.  I just need to decide if I'm going to use a page each day, and make something small in the middle but with the option to fill the page, or if I'll cut the pages in half, or into smaller squares.  Trish went with 4X4 inches.  The sketchbook says the pages are 9 X 12 inches, so I could go with a 3X3 square.  I'm still debating....  I have time.

And I'll try to take pictures at least every few days.

Wish me luck!